Midterm Ruminations

Seven weeks into the semester, we're on the verge of yet another lockdown. At the same time, I'm nearing the end of recess week, and breaking away from the descriptive reflection-style entries that I have been posting here, I wanted to give a little update on where exactly I am as an actor and a musical theatre performer.

Well, the short answer is I am nowhere near the professional level in either domain. The long answer is, well, an existential crisis.

In Musical Theatre class at Sing'Theatre, I lag far behind when it comes to music theory and technical voice studies, and I felt so out of touch with my dance abilities. Of course, getting a fresh set of music sheets and choreography every Tuesday certainly helps when I have to memorize lyrics, blocking and movement all at the same time.

On the side of realist acting, things are looking slightly better. I have been acclimatized to just about anything the English language can possibly spell, and over time I have developed an analysis and characterization process that actually works for me, which is thrilling because I remember how badly I used to worry about not being off-book. I still live by my mentor's words, which is to start by annotating the scene and understanding who I am. In short, I focus on the story and not on the lines. Of course, I know that I'm just beginning to scratch the surface of the craft, and I'm excited to learn so much more as I go along.

I prefer telling people that my plan is fluid, but I'm ruling out the overseas BFA at this time. While it may have been a wonderful way to enter the industry with the extreme training that I'm willing to put myself through, I also understand the value of a liberal arts degree. In the College of Humanities and Sciences at NUS, I could honestly say that I'm being exposed to every area of study imaginable while still having time for musical theatre classes and extracurricular-hopping. I am still the self-described obsessive overplanner and I get anxious when I see BFA graduates emerge with a long line of credits that I know I may never attain as a fresh graduate. However, if I can't act in a conservatory, then I'll write my own Broadway-worthy scripts and stage them in NUS. That's the new plan.

I've been very conflicted about whether NUS Theatre is really the right way to go, and whether I should be going for a more intensive program out there. However, in the end, I believe that this might be the most sustainable option. What I may not have in conservatory-taught technique, I will compensate with the uniqueness of my acting journey.

And since I decided to wrap up this blog post only today, I just completed my first play performance. It went amazing, and I can't wait to talk about how it went later this week.